Dealing With a Breakup

Hello, everyone!

This is a little different to what I usually post, however, I have been trying to branch out a bit and write more life-related posts as that is the kind of thing that I like to read. Those of you who know me will know that last year I came out of a 4-year relationship. I thought I would share some tips and advice for anyone going through a similar situation.

Just over a year ago I moved to Nottingham with my then-boyfriend. He was due to start a graduate job whereas I was going back to uni. To cut a long story short, we both realised that it wasn’t working and decided to call it quits. I have to admit, I did not handle it very well at all. I spent a lot of time crying and unsure of what my future would be. I then decided to move back to Norwich just before Christmas. This was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I may still feel unsure as to what to future holds, however, I am in a much better place mentally and I feel better about where my life is headed.

Surround yourself with people

The main thing that I did when I was newly single was surrounded myself with friends and family. Initially, this was to distract myself from being sad, however, I soon realised just how much I had neglected my friends and family. I would message my friends almost daily either for a chat or to hang out. Try not to isolate yourself. It may be tempting to sit at home with Netflix and ice cream – but that doesn’t really help you to feel better. Push yourself to be a bit more social – you never know who you may end up meeting.

Open up

It is so important that you keep talking about how you’re feeling. Whether this is with friends, family, or even just venting to your pet. Honestly, this helped me so much. I finally felt like I could breathe again. If you’d rather not talk to someone; you could always keep a diary instead. 

Allow yourself to be sad

Feeling sad is a completely normal reaction to going through a breakup. Each situation is different and people have different ways of dealing with a breakup. You may feel a whole range of different emotions. I know that I felt a lot of anger, sadness, confusion, and even relief. Allow yourself to feel those emotions, but don’t let them consume you.

Stop creepin’

Do NOT stalk your ex on social media. You do not need to know how they are doing or what they are up to. If you have decided to remain friends and you don’t want to unfriend or unfollow your ex on social media, mute them. That way you won’t have to see all of their latest life updates – they will be none the wiser. This will help you move on so much quicker and it will take your mind off them.

Give yourself time

Everyone gets over a breakup at different rates. Depending on your personality and the relationship. It may take you a couple of weeks, or it may even take you months. Don’t lose hope – you will get there. Use this time of focus on yourself, do something you’ve always wanted to do, and use it as an excuse to try new things.

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That’s all of the tips I can think of. I hope you have a fantastic week and happy first day of autumn!


23 thoughts on “Dealing With a Breakup

  1. The last tip is nice. Give yourself time. Time heals even the worst cases. To add, don’t do things when you feel overwhelmed, thank me later.

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  2. Great advice. After my husband and I split we stayed friends on social media. After 10 years when all the kids were grown and our divorce final I blocked him. It would have been much easier if I could have done it sooner.

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  3. Breakups can be difficult especially when you’ve been with someone for a long time. I completely agree that you should surround yourself with others and give yourself time to heal. It can be a process, but after awhile… it won’t be so bad.

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  4. Breakups are sooo tough! But you have some really insightful comments about dealing, particularly that it’s okay to be sad. You need space to grieve that loss in your life.

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  5. Break ups are tough. I had when I was young about 24 years of age. It seemed to me end of world. I hope I knew about your suggestions then. Recovery would have been much faster. But today when I am married and have a wonderful boy I feel great and that the relation before was not worth.

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  6. True, breakups are hard but we all get through it. I love this – very awesome post. Sometimes we feel that it’s the end of the world but all we have to do is to give ourselves time – time to heal and enjoy life.

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  7. Yes, feel your feelings, surrounding yourself with amazing people and keeping busy doing things you enjoy. All good advice. Also, exercise, take a class, start a new hobby, do yoga, take time out for yourself and figure out who you are outside of a relationship.
    Focus on internal happiness by practicing self love and self care.

    http://www.aveshaempower.com

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  8. Good tips. During my breakup , surrounding myself with my friends, doing self care and yes, not stalking or checking at any cost was so helpful to overcome.

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  9. Glad that you have family and friends that surrounds you in your saddest moments. They are the ones that should be given of your love and time.

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