Terrible Christmas Jokes

Blogmas Day 10!

I cannot believe Christmas is only 15 days away, how exciting! No Christmas is complete without some terrible cracker jokes so I thought why not compile a list of the best worst jokes around. I would just like to add that I am laughing so much whilst writing these jokes out. They’re so bad that they’re good. 00_full_size_room_3.jpg

What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
Claustrophobia!

How will Christmas dinner be different after Brexit?
No Brussels.

What’s a specimen? 
An Italian astronaut.

What do you call a man with a pole through his leg?
Rodney.

What do you call a woman who stands between two goal posts?
Annette.

What says Oh Oh Oh?
Santa walking backwards!

What do you call a bankrupt Santa?
Saint Nickel-less!

What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit?
Krisp Kringle!

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It’s Christmas, Eve!

What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer! (I think this is the worst one yet)

What is your favourite terrible Christmas joke?


One thought on “Terrible Christmas Jokes

  1. Saint Nickel-less is kinda funny, but the rest are questionable. I did snicker a couple of times however.

    No, I don’t have any un-funny Christmas jokes to share, mainly because my memory for jokes in general is terrible. I know I’ll write Nickel-less down. Interestingly enough, I resonate with this one. That’s a story though, not a joke!

    Like

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